The Pain of Death of A Loved One and How You Can Benefit From It

The room is silent and still. You can only hear the silent beep of the machine. Doctors and nurses pump so a thin lady would still live. The lady on the hospital bed gasps for air. She fights to take away the very thing that keeps her alive. Every bit of her body feels pain. Her heart is torn. She can no longer bear the pain but she still wants to live as she thinks of the family and people she cares for. Then comes another doctor. She calmly tells the family that the lady’s brain has stopped its function. Despair, fear, and terrible sadness are felt by the lady’s family. Another soul is now home with the Lord.

Each person would eventually face death. No one can escape the sting of death. The death of a loved one is a universal occurrence. Each family soon realizes this one way or another. No one wants to experience it but everyone has to face it.

I never thought of the day where I would have to face the reality that I will lose my beloved Mother. She has fought the battle and I believed she fought it well. I never thought I would lose my 62-year old Mom.

It has been three months since I said goodbye to her earthly remains. Everyone has his or her way of coping but the pain still lingers. Even with the pain of her death, I personally have learned ways where we can benefit from the pain of death of a loved one.

The pain of death of a loved one makes us value our loved ones more.

People cry for their loved ones for many reasons. One reason is that the dead shall no longer be in their presence. However, those who are left behind cry because of regret. Regret that we have not shown how we really value our loved ones.

We may have told our loved ones “I love you.” However, there are instances when they do not feel loved. We should learn how to love them the way they want to be loved.  This makes us rethink that we should exert more effort in showing how we value them and love them more.

The pain of death of a loved one makes us value time.

Charles Darwin said, “A man who dares to waste one hour of time has not discovered the value of life.”  People have the tendency to waste time. We tend to promise ourselves to do a thing-to-do at a later time and then perform some not-so-significant act.

The pain of death of a loved one motivates us to reach our fullest potential.

There are two types of motivation. Motivation could either be extrinsic or intrinsic. Extrinsic motivation is motivation that happens because we either want a reward or avoid punishment. Intrinsic motivation is motivation that happens because it is personally rewarding and we enjoy it.  The death of a loved one motivates us intrinsically because we want to reach our potential because we do it in their memory. Our fire and our desire to be the best we can be can be the result of experiencing the pain of death of a loved one.

 The pain of death of a loved one makes us grateful for Heaven.

The average lifespan of a person according to the Bible is 70 years. What is seventy years compared to a life of eternity in Heaven? Heaven makes us grateful that even if we feel pain, we have an eternity to look forward to in the presence of people we loved the most.

We may walk the valley of the shadow of death. We may feel pain when we lose the ones we love. However, we can still be grateful  we will have an eternity with the ones that we love.

 Lornajane Altura

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8 Basic Skills Teachers Need to Learn to Get Ahead

People from all walks of life want to succeed. Success has even become a business with all the self-help books and coaching programs that have sprouted in the online world. 

Teachers are at the forefront of educating the future leaders. Thus, they need to be the models on how to become successful. 

For first time readers of my blog, I would like to share that I teach in  a public school and I have observed 8 basic skills in our department heads that you can learn in order to get ahead.

Here are eight of them:

1. Balanced Lalice. Time Management. 

"One always has time enough, if one will apply it well." This quote is by Johann Wolfgang von Goethe. All teachers have the same 24 hours in a day. No one has an excess or less of an hour every day. Time is the most important asset you have. If you can manage your time management skills, you and your group will have higher productivity, better decision-making, and better quality work. 

I think Lalice Joy Arquintillo, Filipino Department Head, gets to have this as she can balance her life as a loving mom and wife, a good leader for her department, a spiritual person, and a good listening buddy to her people by having proper time management skills. 

2. Passionate Herma. Wide reader.

“Read in order to live.” This quote is by Gustave Flaubert. Teachers should be wide readers. We should not only focus on the subject we teach but we should have a passion for reading. Learning should never stop. I have seen her read good books that are normally read by teachers. 

Herma Mamon is the English Deparment Head.

3. Entrepreneurial Nic. Money Skills.

“An entrepreneur assumes the risk and is dedicated and committed to the success of whatever he or she undertakes.” This quote is by Victor Kiam. Teachers are known to be conservative when it comes to planning for their money. Teachers with their meager income with large expenses should undertake business ventures. 

Nicolasita Reyes, Math Department Head, is one the founding members of a school cooperative.

4.Fun-loving Sheila. Ability to laugh at yourself.

"If you can't laugh at yourself, life's gonna seem a whole lot longer than you like." This movie quote from Garden State speaks abou having the ability to laugh at yourself. 

Teachers are put into a lot of pressure. Being able to put fun while working is a great asset to any teacher. It makes the load seem lighter.

Phoebe Sheila Villalva is the Head of the Values Education Department.

5. Cooperative Reynaldo. Interpersonal Skills.

"You don't win with the best talent - you win with the five players who are able to play well together." This anonymous quote I think best describes having interpersonal skills in order to succeed.  Being a team player in any organization is a must in order to succeed. 

Reynaldo Octavio is the Head of the Technology and Livelihood Education Department. 

6. Humble Stella Mae. The silent worker. 

"A meaningful life is not being rich or popular, but being highly educated, being real and humble. And being able to share ourselves and touch the lives of others." This anonymous quote can best describe this skill. There are many who have accomplished much in the workplace but keep this for themselves. They conscientiously work on their task. 

7. Go-getter Pete. Ability to delegate tasks.

"Delegating means letting others become the experts and hence the best." This quote by Timothy Firnstahl shows that delegating tasks is a skill in order to succeed in life. I saw Pete Palomar, Head of the Araling Panlipunan Department, start as a Supremet Student Government Adviser delegate tasks and guiding student leaders into achieving results.

8. Selfless Delia. Ability to help others. 

“No one is useless in this world who lightens the burdens of another.” This quote by Charles Dickens shows that anyone can be usefulin this world as long as we help by lightening the burden of other people. 

Delia Levalib, HEad of the MAPEH Department, assists people in any possible way that she can.  Despite her physical constraints, she assists many teachers from our school especially when it comes to checking of forms.

Being successful can be as easy if we follow these 8 basic skills that I learned from our Department Heads.

To your Success!

 Lornajane Altura

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THE VALUE OF TIME

“Time is precious, Waste it wisely.”

This quotation by Mr. Anonymous has got my attention as I was surfing the net. 

Recently, I attended a Big Event by Alliance in Motion Global and one of the things that stuck to my mind was the short message by John Asperin, Chief Marketing Officer about Time. Here is a summary of what he said:

1. Time is Treasure. Sir John said that people could either Pay Now Play Later or Play Now Pay Later. It is a person’s choice whether he wants to enjoy now and suffer later or vice-versa. The time spent on the choices we make counts on the results of tomorrow. Thus, time is treasure.

2. Time is Investment. Time lost can never be regained. The things we do currently in the present time will affect what we will have in the future. If we want to be a basketball player, then we have to invest time learning basketball and not baseball. If we want to be rich, we have to spend time building relationships with people who have been on the journey towards financial freedom and we should not waste time spending it with people who do not  have a vision for success. 

3. Time should be Multiplied. He said that in order to be successful, a person should multiply time. Time can be multiplied by doing leverage. Leverage is maximizing income through the efforts of other people. By having a network, a person can multiply his time. The great thing about leverage is that people work together.

4. Time is Experience. Experience is relative with time. A person who is driving a car for the first time does it differently with a person who is already a professional driver. 

What struck my heart and mind was this: “ Are you willing to continue to spend time on success-bearing activities?” 

My answer is Yes.

What about you? Are you willing to do what it takes to reach success? Time is running out. Do what it takes to use time wisely. Waste it wisely 

To Your Success. 

 Lornajane Altura

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THE FIVE FINGERS OF LEADERSHIP

We see and meet leaders in our daily lives. We work with them at our workplace. We listen to them during classes. We dine with them in our homes. We hear their sermons on Sundays. However, sad to say, not all leaders are effective when it comes to leading their flocks. Some followers become disenchanted that their lives somehow fall apart when leaders commit mistakes. 

Last week, I was blessed to attend a special training with a great leader. He is a minister of a religious organization as well as life coach in one of the largest companies in the Philippines that is expanding worldwide. He is Pastor John Fortune Gay.

They say people listen to you when they know you practice what you preach. You do what you say. You commit to what you affirm. That is leadership in practice.

He spoke for an hour but what I learned was like ten modules combined in one. Pastor John Gay talked about the fingers of leadership. Here is what I learned:

1. The Thumb (Strength of Character). The thumb is probably the most important finger. Lots of things cannot be done without it. Pastor John Gay said that it symbolizes strength of character.  A person who is a leader should have integrity and the character to do what he plans to do. He practices what he preaches or teaches. A good leader should have a great attitude. 

2. The Pointing Finger (Direction). A leader should know where he is headed. He must have direction. He knows his goals. He knows where his group is headed. 

3. The Middle Finger (Spirit of Excellence). Since a leader is a person of influence, he must exhibit excellence in what he does. He should be excellent in his work, at home, and even with his own character. 

4. The Ring Finger (Relationships). A leader should have good relationships with the people he deals with in his life. I remember his story about a teacher who gave an exam to his students. One of the questions was about the name of the utility worker cleaning the comfort room. The person telling the story then was ashamed that he did not get to know the name of the person concerned. The teacher was telling them that everyone is important. Relationships are important.

5. The Little Finger (Small Things).  People think that successful leaders become great leaders in one blink of an eye. However, they become great because of the small things they do everyday. A person who does well in small things do great when given responsibility with large things.

If you are an aspiring leader or is leading a flock or group of people who look up to you, these five fingers of leadership are great guides in honing ourselves to become a very good leader if not the best one.

Be the best leader that you can be.

To Your Success. 

 Lornajane Altura

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THE TEN COMMANDMENTS OF WORKING ON A HOME-BASED BUSINESS WHILE WORKING ON A FULL-TIME JOB

1. Thou shalt not combine one with the other for each endeavour is a jealous one. 

You cannot intermingle business interests with your full-time job. Your boss will notice and keep an unreasonable eye on you and find fault on your daily actions. I remember a story about my friend who was into freelance writing and her boss kept on checking on her once in a while thinking she (friend) has left her guard down. 

2. Thou shalt not “worship” one or the other. 

Many who transition from a full-time job “worship” their home-based business and forget they still have duties and responsibilities with their current jobs. Pamela, a high school teacher, tend to forget about her classes while working on her business. This hurts her reputation as a worker.

3. Thou shalt not begrudge all the negativity of the full-time job.

People are never attracted to negative individuals. Even if your job sucks, it is never right to publicly announce how work makes you feel drained with all the negativity. Your positive attitude can be the tool in attracting others with your business. 

4. Remember Family Day.

Working on a full-time job and a home-based business can take its toll on a person. However, getting busy with either should never take away your time with your family. 

There was this story of a child who had a very busy father. One day, he asked as to how much is his day’s salary. The father told his child as to why he is very interested. The kid said he wants to buy his father’s time. Sad but true. Dads, moms, and even adult children do not spend quality time with their family anymore because they are so engrossed with work and business.

5. Honour thy boss.

In this world filled with people with imperfect traits, we can never have perfect workplaces. It is very possible that an employee finds himself a better “boss” compared to his boss at work. However, the golden rule is still to do unto others what you want others to do unto you. 

6. Thou shalt not end relationships because of poor money decisions.

Often times, money gets in the way of relationships. This especially holds true when business ventures are done with co-workers. Always remember that people are important. Never risk when the collateral is your friendship or relationship with the other.

7. Thou shalt not be disloyal.

You can show loyalty with your work and with your business. Give what is due to your work and give what is due to your business. That is loyalty.

8. Thou shalt not steal.

Time is a very precious commodity. Do not steal working hours with your business and vice-versa. Do time management wisely. Do not steal the time of one and use that with the other.

9. Thou shalt not engage with negative people.

Being around negative people drains the energy of even the most positive person. Working on a full-time job with negative people can release negative ions that can be absorbed by positive people. Being surrounded by negative people at work can affect your performance with your home-based business as well.

10. Thou shalt not covet.

The motivation with doing a home-based business while working on a full-time job is dependent on each person. However, keeping up with the Joneses should never be the reason why you engage in both. Be happy with the success of others.

If you agree with these commandments, share your thoughts about it.

To Your Success!

 Lornajane Altura

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4 MONEY MISTAKES THAT YOU DON’T KNOW YOU’RE DOING

MONEY MISTAKES

We all make mistakes when it comes to handling money matters. Managing money is an important factor in life. However, too many Filipinos are making mistakes that hinder them from taking control of their finances.

Peso Mistake #1: Filipinos do not have clear financial goals.

Filipinos have this general idea of desiring their dream house and dream car. However, most Pinoys do not have an idea on what they really want and on how to get there.

Pinoys spend their money on shoes and clothes and some Starbucks.  Although these are needed (I doubt with the Starbucks part), they do not realize that their money goes to these items and not to their dream house or dream car. Buying more cappuccino is less likely to be found in their financial goals, but this is where most Pinoys spend their money on the little things.

If you know what you want, you will shift all of your resources towards that mark.

Peso Mistake #2: Filipinos avoid finances.

Pinoys tend not to look at their statement bills or even look at their bank account. Pinoys avoid discussing money with their parents, with their partners, because they do not want to create guilt or conflict, or discussion makes them too anxious.

It is recommended that this issue should be resolved rather than just put away. It is more stressful to avoid the problem rather than face the problem.

Peso Mistake #3: Filipinos do not know how much they are spending.

During my elementary days, I had this classmate named Ria Mae Corda, who at the mere age of 8 years, already knows how to take note of her finances. She had this small notebook and she uses this to record ALL of her spending for the day.

Imagine a small child knowing how to manage her finances yet most adults do not even know where their money goes to. Pinoys know the big bills like rent or electricity bill, however, they do not know where their money goes on the smaller stuff like new clothes or groceries.

Walkington, a Canadian money coach, recommends keeping record of everything for a few months to know where the money goes. She advises to make a limit to each expense and not to spend beyond it.

Peso Mistake #4. Filipinos depend on credit.

Suze Orman, a Pinoy financial coach, said that credit card debt is “financial sin.” She gives advice that before saving money, before investing, the number one goal is on how to pay off the credit card debt. Pinoys will be in greater problem at the 36% interest.

These are four common money mistakes that you do not know you’re doing. You should start creating and defining your financial goal. Even if you think that your financial outlook does not look so bright, you still can manage your money.

Create your goal, be motivated by it, manage your finances, and then your financial future will look brighter.

To Your Success!

 Lornajane Altura

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Pinoy Millionaire Series: Success Story of A Web Developer/Programmer

"Plan your early retirement."

This is one of the tips of our feature for the third in our Pinoy Millionaire Series.

From a nurse, to a doctor, we now have a successful Pinoy web developer/programmer to be featured.

Read this interview and learn tips on how to be successful financially.

1. What is your complete name?

Arnel Cristobal Navarra

2. Where did you grow up?

Tondo, Manila

3. How young are you?

41 years old

4. What was your profession?

Graphic artist, web designer, web developer/programmer

5. How would you describe yourself in a sentence?

I am a bit emotional but helpful most of the times. 

One of Arnel's pet projects about financial literacy

6. What used to be your perspective in life when it comes to becoming successful financially? What is your perspective now?

Old: be a successful programmer

Now: be a successful entrepreneur. Not really a company man.

7.  What was the turning point in your life that made you who you are today?

When I realized my income would not make my family survive when I reach the age of 50. 

8.  What are your current successes in life?

I'm enjoying much of my time for my wife and kids now. More time to focus on developing assets. 

Arnel does Goal Setting 101 with his team

9.  What motivates you to do what you do?

I always look at my kids and I always remember my promises to my one and only wife.

Arnel as fun-loving Dad

10. How did you reach your current success?

I really planned for an early retirement. I decided to focus on doing business rather than being employed for the rest of my life. I really stopped working in 2006 did printing business. after 6 months .. closed. I continued as freelance programmer. developed my web development company in dec 2006 only to realize ....I'm just doing all the tasks.

Arnel enjoying his free trip to Singapore

11. Do you believe that a person who works hard will become successful?

I believe. only with right opportunity and must have adequate financial education. 

12. Can you tell us briefly of your business that made you succeed?

I joined the biggest DS/MLM company in the country in April 2011. That's AIM global. I stayed focused on developing programs for my team and founded Dreamweavers Alliance Internationale, Inc.

13.  What is your favorite quotation?

"Huwag kang magmamadali. Bilisan mo lang!" - Arnel Navarra

and 

Delight thyself also in the Lord: and he shall give thee the desires of thine heart. Psalm 34:7

14. Who do you consider as your mentors in your financial success?

Primarily my Pastor

My Fav author Robert Kiosaki

and the Word of God

Christ Himself

My former Chinese boss... Sir King Go

Arnel enjoying the first fruits of Leverage

15. What are the steps that you did so you can reach your status now?

I just focused on what is urgent and important

.... focus on leverage and NOT income.

16. What are some tips that you can give to aspiring millionaires?

a. Be financially literate first

b. Plan your early retirement. Chinese retires at the age of 30.

c. Know your needs and wants

d. Establish income generating assets to provide for your needs and wants

e. Maintain a low liability life-style.

f. Master the difference between assets and liabilities

g. If you want to start a business ... start with Network Marketing.

h. Then develop more business or create more assets.

End of Interview.

Hope you learned great insights from another Pinoy millionaire.

To Your Success!

Lornajane Altura

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